Thursday, June 20, 2013

My darling daughter

The truth is I was terrified to have a daughter. I was so relieved when I learned that my first child would be a boy. And, by the time I got pregnant with the second baby, I had all my excuses in place. I could pass along the clothing and the toys. I already "knew" how to get a boy through the first several years; I was prepared. When I learned the news about having a baby girl, I was thrilled with joy (gosh...I get one of each) and positively scared (how many different ways will I screw up my little darling daughter).

Serene is independent, determined and very smart. She can do anything her brother can do. Even though she is five years younger, she can climb any obstacle, run just as fast, stay up just as late and hit just as hard as big brother. She picks her battles and sticks them out. She will scream if you try to help her until she is ready to receive your help. These qualities will serve her extremely well when she is an adult. Surviving her teenage hers will be a test of will power on both of our parts.

Mainly though, I didn't want a daughter to grow up in the same world as me -- with many less opportunities and even more real dangers. As much as I'm afraid for me being a good mom, setting a good example, embracing her independence while teaching her to be aware of the realities the world throws at girls & women, I am also afraid for her. How will she tackle imbalances in the world and remain as strong and confident as she is at just 2 years old?

Mostly Serene likes to play with whatever toy is in her brother's hand. But, lately she found a doll and she plays mommy. She was scolding the baby doll the other day in the same way she hears me scold Alex. There is nothing more powerful than your children mimicking you to get you to really see the reflection in the mirror. Its a long road ahead for me and Serene. Heck, there are still over 120 days until her next birthday. And, we both have a lot to learn. But, I'm starting to feel like -- together -- we can do it.